Newsletter, Olivia

Month 25

Dear Olivia,

NO

NO

NO

This appears to be the only word you are capable of speaking lately.  Anything we ask of you, you respond with a firm NO!  Somtimes you just blurt it out and I second guess myself thinking, did I just daze off and ask you something?  I have resorted to parent self-help books which I thought would never happen.  At one time I thought these books were for lazy parents with no clue how children operated.  Little did I know these would become my sacred books – my bible so to speak.  If anything, I’m really just looking for confirmation that what I’m dealing with is completely normal and I’m not dealing with some child of Lucifer.  The problem with these books though is you leave a chapter thinking how easy it is to deal with a 2 year old.  You simply speak to your toddler in a calm and soothing tone while remaining in full control of your emotions.  When your child is having a full on temper tantrum complete with legs kicking, spitting, hissing and total head turning, simply speak to your child in a calm voice that what they’re doing is not ok and when they’re finished, you can continue on doing what you were planning.  I read these books thinking, hell – I can do this.  It’s just a 2 year old for pete’s sake.  But the moment comes.  You refuse to put on your underwear and jump around me screaming NO! NO! NO!  Meanwhile, your brother wakes up in the other room and starts screaming.  You decide your voice isn’t loud enough and you turn it up a notch while deciding to hurl your body at me.  At that time, the author’s voice enters in to my head and I remember, “speak calmly – remain in control.”  This somehow has a differnt effect on me and suddenly the rage enters my body.  HOW THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO STAY CALM WITH ALL THIS CRAP GOING ON AROUND ME!!  WHO IS THIS NUTJOB WHO WROTE THIS CRAP-ASS BOOK!!  From the pit of my stomach I scream STOP IT NOW!  You in turn smile and giggle and continue with your favorite word, NOOOOO!  Now really, how is one supposed to respond to this? You would think over time, evolution would have a way of course correcting this.  Can you imagine back in the day while the cave-mom was out picking berries or basketweaving or what ever they did back then and their little child is in the corner saying “mom, mom, mommy, mom, momma, mom.”  You know how easy it would be for that mother to tell her little one to go out and give the mountain lions a hug.  I would definitely be tempted.

Your little brother is finally here and I’m positive most of this new behavior is because of him.  You know your attention is being shared and you do your best to get a reaction out of your Father and I.  We do our best to keep you happy whether that be listening to all 3 Shreks in the car over and over again or giving you obscene amounts of crackers.  We have watched our tiny little O-Bear turn in to a little girl with opinions.  My problem is your opinions don’t match my own and that’s going to be a problem.  Your Grandpa O’Donnell coined it well, our little Miss O has turned in to little Miss No.

I have come to the realization that the immense energy you have is not worth fighting over.  Instead I’m looking at outlets for you to exude this energy because quite frankly, nights are hell when you are hyper.  I have started taking you on long walks after naptime.  I’m talking long – at least a mile.  I’m not kidding when I say I need you to release this energy.  The thing about these walks though is you have to be patient as all hell.  If anyone has ever walked with a toddler knows that you stop to look at everything.  When I say everything, I literally mean everything.  Look Momma a stick, a crack in the sidewalk, a leaf, ants, a dead bug, a bush and whatever else is lying around.  I try not to make a big deal out of it because it gets you out of the house and you’re learning at the same time.  Just the other day you got a full animal planet experience.  We’re walking down a trail when you spot an adorable black kitty in the path.  You stop and in your sweet little voice call “kitty!”  Kitty is just sitting, staring at a bush.  I’m thinking something is not quite right here.  I tell you to come along, kitty doesn’t want to be bothered right now.  You continue to call “kitty!”  Suddenly the cat dives into a bush but he only buries his head – the rest of his body is rigid, hanging out of the bush.  I’m thinking, huh – that’s odd.  The cat stayed that way for sometime so I’m thinking, maybe this cat is trying to hide from you?  I tell you again, “come on dear, the kitty doesn’t want to be bothered.”  Suddenly the cat jumps out with a big ol’ mouse squirming from it’s mouth.  You look at me with this priceless expression – half frightened, half sad.  I tell you the two are going to dinner together.  You seem a little confused but accept my response. 

This month really has been challenging for me but I knew it would be.  I really should give you a break – you are only 2 years old for crying out loud.  There are days when I think I really need to lighten up – just laugh at the crazy moments.  So you peed on the couch three times in one day – I guess it could be worse.  You could take a permament black marker to the couch.  True story, I actually saw this happen on a blog – I would have cried then sold you for a new couch.  I think I just need to accept the fact that you’re going through an exploring phase and there will be messes and accidents and I just need to get over it.  I do worry about being chronically angry – that is the whole purpose why I decided to stay home and not work.  I figured I would be an awful person if I had to juggle both right now.  I promise I will lighten up more but that may also mean I am drinking more.  You can’t have both kid.  I have heard the drunk version of me is more fun anyways so it really is a win-win for all.  On that note, bottoms up!

Love,

Momma

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